How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
Thou hath brought my hair shine and shape and height
And color that shimmers in the light
And a gorgeous, fresh and flawless face.
But I love thee most when it’s time to pay
Because saving cash seems so very right
At a time when my budget's really tight.
I love thee purely! Thou hath made my day!
I love thee with a passion deep and true
For off'ring highlights at a price divine
With a scalp massage and a shampoo
For making me look so very fine.
God, I love my new stylish hairdo
And I love thee as much, coupon of mine!
Special thanks to Elizabeth Barrett Browning for allowing her famous poem to be altered in this manner. Said Ms Barrett Browning: “It’s the least I could do. If I had lived in your millennium, you can bet I would’ve been all over that coupon!”
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